What Goes Around Comes Around…

So today, my daughter calls me.  Everything is fine, she’s just all in a tither.  I guess her step-daughter, who recently turned 10, is starting to “demonize”.  By this, I mean the phenomena that happens when a sweet young girl begins to turn into a whiny, nasty, mouthy, pouty pre-teen or “tween” or teen and all of a sudden HATES you (her parents) for no particular reason.

I guess this girl, A, who really is a very beautiful and sweet girl from what I’ve seen, threw a holy FIT at school yesterday because my daughter, J, would not just let her run off to a friend’s house without knowing who the mom was, where they lived, the phone number, etc.  In short, my daughter has become a PARENT!  So, A proceeded to toss a screaming, Tasmanian Devil fit at the school, in the car, and after they got home.  Then, she went and pouted outside and when J went to get her, was gone!

There was my J, who I had traipsed all over Pueblo for, called the police over, came within a hair’s breadth of turning her over to Social Services, getting in HER car, driving around looking for HER child…well, step-child, but I know she does really love this girl.  Despite what could have been a serious situation, I had to laugh.  I mean, I got a real, deep, joyful belly laugh out of that.

Then, she said, “Oh, my God, I did that to you, didn’t I?”  To which I replied “Only for about 7 years.”

She’s a way tougher parent than I was.  I was not a rebellious kid and I enjoyed my teenage years for the most part, since it was the first time I had really been “settled” anywhere.  So I was totally unprepared for my daughter’s demonization.  And, boy, she demonized with a vengeance!

So, now she is getting a taste of her own medicine, but it will be fine because she has the training to handle it from her own not-so-far-ago adolescence.

My only advice to her was that she and her husband MUST be on the same page with each other and they MUST present a united front.  If they do that, and the kids realize that they cannot play one parent against the other, then they can pretty much try whatever they want.

Oh, and I wished her good luck.  But I’m still giggling.  Better her than me, that’s all I can say!!

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One thought on “What Goes Around Comes Around…

  1. My partner and I have had some discussion about fostering her teenage niece. The girl is living with her paternal grandmother, T’s mom, and it is not the best situation.

    I have raised a child, mostly on my own, and know what is coming down the pike. T doesn’t really remember her own adolescence (we are 50 y/o, after all) but thinks we could do it.

    Of course we could. And, if the situation were really untenable with the grandmother, we would. But, as a childless, peri-menopausal woman, T doesn’t have the faintest idea of the committment involved.

    We’ll see what the future holds on that score…

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