The Big 5-0

Today’s my birthday! I’m a big believer in celebrating birthdays, for those who want to celebrate, and I do! Of course, I would never force a birthday celebration on anyone, especially a Jehovah’s Witness. I worked with a guy once, Alex, who really, really reminded me of my youngest brother. We connected like me and my bro’ did, bantered the same way, had the same kinds of philosophical, ironic conversations. He was (still is) a JW. He never tried to “convert” me, but he would answer any question I had. Once, kidding, I asked him if he knew when his birthday was. He gave me one of THOSE looks, and said, “Yes, of course, I KNOW when it is, I just don’t celebrate it!” Turns out, he has the same BD as my little brother. OK, now how wierd is that??

But that’s not about MY birthday. Today, I got up at about 5:15 a.m. (after a serious debate with myself), tossed on some clothes and headed out to my favorite place to watch the sun rise. I got there just as ol’ Sol was peeping himself over the horizon, so I settled down against a big rock, and managed to get the firestarter lit long enough to get some incense going. I was up on a high promontory, and the wind is always fierce up there. I faced due east into the rising sun, and just above my right shoulder, the waning crescent moon was still visible in the cloudless sky. In Pueblo, there are mountains on 3 sides of us, and today, there was snow on just about all of them. That was a great site to see. Birds swooped and chirped everywhere. I could hear a baby crying off to the right, where numerous houses have been built up over the 14 years that I’ve lived here.

So, I sat for a while, thinking and not thinking. There are times when I just need to not think. I live a lot in my head, so not thinking is really like a vacation for me! I just looked, felt, WAS. I need to BE more often, rather than do. Unfortunately, in our society, it’s not considered quite “kosher” to just BE without doing anything. Maybe today, I can begin to let go of that reluctance to just sit and stare into space without a particular purpose or goal. Maybe not having a goal is a good thing. To let life unfold instead of trying to force it in one direction or another.

Perhaps I’ll spend the next 50 years being a bit more and doing a bit less. Sounds like a plan to me.

Happy Birthday to ME!



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