In Which I Succumb to the Lure of the Infomercial

As you know, I’ve been working on exercising regularly, eating better and trying to lose some weight via that route.  G and I recently got a Wii and the Wii Fit Plus which we have been using together and it’s a lot of fun.  I also love working out with this guy’s FitTV programs along with the old faithfuls of walking and riding my bike.  It’s been nice finding a varied routine that stays fresh.

Most of the time, I am about 90% satisfied with my body.  I realize it’s far from “perfect” per media images and medical statistics, but it’s strong, it’s flexible, it carries me through the day with a minimum of aches and pains, and it’s never really let me down for nearly 53 years.  Pretty good record, I think.  However, there is one area of my body that I have had “issues” with for the better part of my life: my upper arms.

I hate my upper arms.  Particularly the underside/triceps area.  Truly, flapping them hard enough can create serious air currents when I’m in a closed room.  I realize that part of this problem is genetic (I have my mom’s arms–thanks mom!).  It also stems from my teenage years when I lost a lot of weight and grew several inches in a short period of time, thereby receiving many stretch marks all over, but notably on the backs of my arms, right were the sleeve seam line goes.  Stretch marks are like runs in stockings; they may fade, but the skin never goes back to its original elasticity.

Oh, I’ve done all the exercises–triceps kicks, stretches over the head, triceps reverse push-ups, dips, etc.  I thought swimming would help, NOT.  Don’t get me wrong–my arms are pretty strong, but from elbow to shoulder I look like the Michelin man.  Shirts are hard to buy; when I made my own clothes, I used to adjust the sleeve pattern and got spoiled by having sleeves that actually fit my arms.  And what the HELL is with this trend of all the “womens’ size” tops that have frickin’ capped sleeves or bands around them?  What fat woman in her right mind is going to wear capped sleeves or a garment that has a BAND on the sleeve? Do we WANT to walk around looking like we’re in a blood pressure cuff?  Sorry, had to get that off my chest.

So, when I recently saw an infomercial for this product, I admit to being intrigued:

I didn’t call the number on my screen, because being a good Taurus, I had to give some serious thought to it.  So I went to a few sites and checked out some reviews.  Surprisingly, they were pretty much all positive and in one review I saw where the item was available at a retail store near me, so a couple of days later, I went out and got one.

I played with it for a couple of days, and yesterday, I did the “official” video for the first time.  The exercises are fine, and I did actually feel that I had worked all the muscles in my shoulders and upper arms pretty well after only the “6-minute” workout promised, but I ask you, where did they find that woman who demonstrates this thing?  You can’t tell from the photo on the DVD, but this woman’s arms out-sinew Hamilton:


AND Madonna (which is downright scary):

Okay, I get it, this product is supposed to work.  But this poor girl–I mean she’s got shoulders the width of a fridge with arm sinews you could pick your teeth with, but then she tapers down to this tiny, frail little thing with legs that hardly look strong enough to hold all that upper body-ness.  Bless her heart.

I mean, it’s nice to think that my arms will get a little firmer, and less jello-like in the upper areas, but I’m not silly enough to believe that my arms ever would (or even could) look like that.  In fact, it’s kind of painful to look at her.  Even with her video-appropriate smile, she looks more strung out than healthy.

However, despite the spokesperson, I do like this product, I like the workout routine, and I’m pretty sure I’ll use this at least several times a week, if not daily with a pause here and there for recovery.  It wasn’t expensive, it doesn’t need batteries, and it’s targeted specifically for a body part that I want to modify, so overall I’ll give it 2 thumbs up.

But I’m still a little sheepish for finding it via an infomercial!



5 thoughts on “In Which I Succumb to the Lure of the Infomercial

  1. You must go online and find Ellen Degeneres’ show archives where she found this and did a segment on it. It’s really too funny. She gave the audience and her guests them. Don’t know if it works, but her take on it was hilarious.

  2. Any regular exercise is good for you, so, yeah, go for it!
    I feel the same way about my upper arms. They are strong enough to do standard push ups but they don’t look toned AT ALL. My real issue, though, is with my chest (breasts, boobs, tits, mammaries, WHATEVER). That’s a body part I am not happy with and haven’t been for about 40 years. Sigh.

  3. feel like you’ve sold out just because you found it on an infomercial, do ya? have fun, inspired by actually being able to do a long trek and have committed myself to a workout routine..let’s see how it turns out!

  4. i am so sorry GG but i would still have to take a shower after using it…. the picture of Holly Hunter was HOT!

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