Gaining Clarity

Yesterday was not only the day after a big blow-up, it was also my Friday and I was completely exhausted.  In addition to that, I had a nearly 2-hour freelance job that had to be done and the boys came over yesterday afternoon b/c my daughter had several appointments (social services and doctor). 

I spent the work day sitting wrapped in a blanket of misery (as you could see from the below) and I still had much typing to do when that was over with.  Needed a break, so when I got done with one job, I went up and took GS2 for a nice walk.  He’s such a sweet kid.  We walked down by the lake, looking at and listening to different birds.  I showed him what a meadowlark sounded like.  It was good to walk and have a far gaze instead of squinting at a computer screen.  I always gain a little insight when putting one foot in front of the other.

Last night was better.  We’re going to work on our finances.  We got online and actually found a hotel in SF and booked our reservation.  It’s RIGHT down on Fisherman’s Wharf between the 2 piers where I’ll be swimming and it wasn’t an arm and a leg.  Flights we can play around with, but for this thing, the hotel was critical, so we feel better.  We talked some more.

I’m not going to delete the blog and for now it will remain public.  However, I think I want to change the focus on it, perhaps for a while, with less writing and more photographs.  I’ve missed taking pictures and I want to play around with the camera some more.  Maybe I can express myself better in images than words for a while.

I cannot tell you how much your comments and emails have meant to me.  I’ve been online since 1992, and I am a strong believer in and support of virtual community.  You proved it over the last couple of days–connection is connection, regardless of whether it’s with your next door neighbor over the fence or from someone who reaches out to you from half a world away.  Thank you for keeping me honest and for helping to keep me sane.

You’re amazing, wonderful people out there and I’m grateful that you’re willing to put up with my tantrums.

Bless you all.

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